Tuesday, October 02, 2012

The Biology Of Evil

Some cultures believe that illnesses and disease are caused by evil spirits. Djinns.

Which is not to say that a sprite from the underworld suddenly appears in the steam from your freshly made mochaccino and curses you with gonorrhoea and a dowager’s hump.

(Trivia lovers among you might be delighted to learn that Microsoft Spellchecker’s suggestion for gonorrhoea was Gomorra – is God talking to me via Windows 7?)

It’s more that the disease itself has a personality. The disease has a presence on the same spiritual plane as us. 

Ooh get back in yer coffin Derek Acorah!

It sounds farfetched (hey, welcome to my blog!) but I can concur with this belief through my own experiences.

When I was about 9 I came down with a full-blown case of measles. I was delirious for about 4 days. I had constant nightmares and fever dreams. Measles is not a nice disease. Frankly I’m amazed that some parents avoid the MMR jab thinking that the risk of measles is somehow less of a concern. It’s not. Measles can blind. Measles can kill. Measles is truly horrible.

But that’s a separate topic.

On the last night of the fever, just before it broke I sleepwalked for the first and only time in my life. All I can recall of this incident is the feeling of slowly becoming conscious again as I walked in front of the mirror in my bedroom. It was recognizing myself that actually woke me up. Not that I was technically unconscious. My eyes were open. I was talking to myself. In a language that definitely wasn’t English. And the personality that was doing the talking definitely wasn’t mine. It wasn’t me who had been running the show up to this point.

Most of all though, the thing I remember most, is how evil I felt. Pure, pure, almost orgiastic evil.
When I made eye contact with myself in the mirror the other personality vanished. It just went. The fever broke and I collapsed onto the floor to be carried back into my bed by my parents who must have been disturbed by the noise I had been making. After that the recovery began and I slowly got better.

Now, years later as an adult, I think about this experience often. And it makes me wonder. Occasionally I’ve considered going to a hypnotherapist to see if I can be regressed back to that night to see what can be discovered.

But then I always think to myself: maybe it’s better to let sleeping dogs lie. Some boxes just shouldn’t be opened.

So.

Was it demonic possession? Does measles have a spiritual presence and a personality that can be interacted with? It could be argued that the capacity to be evil is in all of us even without a disease but I ask you: how much evil can a 9 year old boy contain? And when I say evil I’m not talking about naughtiness or wrong doing; I am talking proper, full-on, Biblical style, pure evil.

Interesting questions, eh?

Next time you have a cold or a case of the flu... and you’re “not feeling yourself” for a few days... well, maybe there’s a damned good reason for that.

Sleep tight.


24 comments:

libby said...

Oooer......spooky. Do you truly believe in regression Steve?

Tenon_Saw said...

I walked in my sleep many times in my youth and always had the same horrid dream when I did. I may email you about this fascinating topic rather than make it all public. I have your email address, unless it has changed.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Yes, you were definitely possessed by an incubus that was making you speak in tongues - evil forked tongues, that is. When it saw your face in the mirror it must have realised you weren't cut out to be Damien mark 2 and buggered off real quick. I could recommend an exorcist if you want to be absolutely sure.

Steve said...

Libby: I still play with Lego. There are many who will say I have never really progressed.

Tenon_Saw: same as it always was. Feel free to share.

Steve said...

Gorilla Bananas: I'm not sure I could cope with all the projectile vomiting and the hordes of bluebottles. I think I'll leave things as they are for now.

The bike shed said...

Illness and delirium are common bedfellows, whether caused by desease or drink! You sure you didn't just have too much tonic wine when you had the measles?

Steve said...

The Bike Shed: I was a teetotaller as a boy. The strongest thing to pass my lips was Vimto.

Katriina said...

Fascinating. I've heard that epileptic fits can cause people to have visions of God; maybe measles-induced delirium does cause people to be possessed by the devil. Does this mean that illnesses can be classified as either good or evil? or that pure good and pure evil are just two sides of the same coin? Good grief, this is all too profound for a Tuesday evening!

Steve said...

Katriina: more importantly... does Lemsip have angelic properties?

Marginalia said...

You little Devil you!

Steve said...

Marginalia: yes. At last an explanation for the constant horn.

John Gray said...

people that are seriously ill often get itu psychosis, which is a mixture of bodily ills, sedation ( either organic or man made)and sensory deprivation....
perhaps that what you experienced?
either that or your middle name is
linda Blair

Steve said...

John: it could be worse. It could be Lionel.

Wanderlust said...

Maybe you were just in an altered state and were tapping into someone else's energy. So a possession of sorts, but an energetic one. I don't know. That's all I got.

Steve said...

Wanderlust: I sincerely hope it wasn't my parent's.

About Last Weekend said...

Just be glad you didn't see the new Indie movie "Sleepwalk with Me" apparently the darling at all the festivals... We did and I wish we had been sleepwalking...out the movie theatre...

Steve said...

About Last Weekend: sounds like they should have filmed my experience instead.

Lady Mondegreen's Secret Garden said...

I guess if a head injury can alter personality, inflammation due to fever can also change us during the short term.

Trish @ Mums Gone To... said...

The only time I witnessed sleepwalking was a few years ago when my son got up in the middle of the night and took a shower. He was very confused as thought it was the morning. Saved him a shower the next morning though.

the fly in the web said...

So just how did Tony Blair access you via vimto?

Steve said...

Lady Mondegreen's Secret Garden: it explains the menstrual cycle too.

Trish: I wish I could sleep work... it would free up my days no end.

Steve said...

The fly in the web: he fooled me under the guise of an honestly wholesome beverage that I thought would do me good.

Being Me said...

Well, this is certainly a post I didn't expect to read today!

I fully trust in the order of our existence (which predates our current lifetime and will continue beyond our time "this time" too, if you're still with me). And that sometimes as young children, we haven't completely finished another lifetime. I know many many many would refuse to even consider that, but witnessing the very trippy and real things my daughter has gone through in the past 6 yrs has made me change my outlook.

Also, do you remember reading that bit in my memoir about the day I looked in the mirror at work? Didn't recognise who was looking back at me? I wonder now what you made of that...

Steve said...

Being Me: I'm not sure what I make of anyone anymore... least of all myself! ;-)