Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Tic Tac Toe

I have managed to acquire yet another noble injury (some of you may recall my previous dip into the murky world of foot injury at the end of 2006).

Skipping, as is my wont, round the house yesterday afternoon with nought on my feet but a good pair of woollen socks my foot erroneously came into contact with the corner of a book shelf.

One humungous snap crackle and pop later... and suddenly I had a beautifully purpled little toe that had ballooned to the size of a New World red grape.

Folks, it’s going to be one helluva vintage.

Though doubting the efficacy of the family doctor Karen nonetheless packed me off to the surgery this morning and he more or less fulfilled my every expectation.

Yes it’s probably broken / fractured but there is little that can be done. It needs to be strapped to the next toe and caressed with ice. It was also recommended that I swallow whatever pain relief product I desired and, most important of all, keep the foot elevated and rested as much as possible.

Fat chance.

I’ve already spent the first 90 minutes at work this morning chasing carpenters, electricians and painters around the building.

A nice warm Shiraz anyone?

16 comments:

Reluctant Blogger said...

Oooh yes, please!

I read some statistic once that said the average person in their lifetime breaks their little toe at least ? times(can't remember the number - but it was something like 4 or 12 or something I thought implausible at the time). Maybe it was correct?

I broke my little toe back last May when I ran in eager anticipation into a room to view something only to find that my sons had rearranged the furniture and where there had previously been a wide open expanse of carpet, was now a large rocking chair! I hate to tell you - but I had to wear flip flops for about 2 months cos it was so painful that I couldn't bear to have shoes anywhere near it. And I began to be teased for sounding like that "Mind The Gap" announcement at Bank Tube. Anytime anyone came within three feet of me, I would yelp "Mind my toe."

Not sure flipflops would be quite the thing for you at work really? They are not altogether manly!

Hope it feels better soon! And yep, I am definitely on for a Shiraz despite the fact that it is early afternoon.

Steve said...

Hmm. Flip-flops eh? You're probably right. Not ideal for the office environment. Not unless I grow my hair long and start lugging a gnarly surfboard around with me, dude. Sandals may be a good compromise though. If they're good enough for Dumbledore they're good enough for me.

P.S. It is never too early for a good Shiraz...

per.pri said...

OOOOOWWWWWWWEEEEEOUCH!

Nasty...

A few years ago I had an unfortunate encounter with the stone hearth of our fireplace back home...a dispicable amount of foul language and a very bloody sock later came the discovery that I had in fact mashed the top of my little toe - YEEEOUCH! That kind of gives an indication as to how hard I hit the thing! One of the most painful experiences EVER!

It gives me shudders just thinking about it!

I hope you are feeling better soon. :)

Also, best wishes with the MIL (mother-in-law) situation...I hope you and your family are coping and things are ok.

:)

Steve said...

Good to hear from you per.pri. A year or so ago I broke a couple of bones in my other foot - I've never known pain like it. A broken toe feels quite mild by comparison. And quite when mild compared to a mashed toe! It makes me feel squeamish too!

The MIL situation isn't too bad. Her tongue and vocal chords are still paralysed but the speech therapist is working on them... We don't know yet how much of her speech she will actually recover. Hope you've had some good news on your own situation too...

Annie said...

Ouch Steve! That sounds MUCH worse than my recently bruised buttocks.
I've a lovely image of you chasing the workmen - I'd be happy to swap places with you :-) However, if swapping meant having the painful toe as well, I'd insist on a motorised wheelchair with the Shiraz on tap.
Wishing you a speedy recovery.

Steve said...

"a motorised wheelchair with the Shiraz on tap"...

Now that would be service! I can't think why my GP didn't make up the prescription on the spot! I feel cheated! I can't do much about the wheelchair but the ol' personal budget might run to a bottle of red...!

The Poet Laura-eate said...

I think keeping one's feet up is a good rule of life generally!

Hope the agony eases soon Steve.

Know what you mean about chasing carpenters, plumbers, electricians round though. Mind you it is more our sub-contractors that give us the runaround if we don't watch them! Beware those on day rates rather than job rates!

Rol Hirst said...

Ouch.

Steve said...

Laura, Rol... thank you for feeling my pain.

Tristan said...

You should have filled in a risk assessment form on the location of that bookcase, mate - all this may have been avoided! ;-)

TimeWarden said...

I hope you were listening to The Thompson Twins, on your iPod, when you attended morning surgery so that as soon as your family practitioner asked, "What seems to be the trouble?" you could point the offending toe in his direction and exclaim, "Oh, Doctor, doctor, Can't you see I'm burning, burning?"!

Matthew Rudd said...

I once bent a little toe backwards as a teenager, walking downstairs in the pitch black while inside a sleeping bag.

Not wise. And not pleasant.

Steve said...

Tris, any half decent risk assessment would attest that boots with toe-tectors and hard hats should be warn around the home at all times... not exactly conducive to catching some R & R!

TimeWarden, indeed - or given the stripey, blotchy nature of my toe maybe a rendition of Tiger Feet would have been just as apt. The pain was certainly making me growl.

Matthew, I may have to add "not walking down the stairs in a sleeping bag" to any future risk assessment... though it sounds like you had an interesting childhood! Either you had no bed or your parents didn't take you camping nearly enough...

Daisy said...

i do that on a regular basis steve...don't feel bad...i've often wondered what the hell is wrong with my depth perception that i can't figure out i have pinky toes and they need to be given space as well...hurts like hell too!

The Sagittarian said...

I feel your pain, brother Steve...since I am also attending physio due to a water fight going wrong (well, it was soooo hot here y'see) and I have damaged my achilles tendon. Very much ouch and heaps of shiraz or basically anything that's going. I refuse to blame the cider.

Steve said...

Sister Amanda I offer my sympathies and empathy. I'm sure the cider is blameless and innocent... I sense a reconciliation approaching.

At least you had some fun acquiring your injury!