Monday, March 03, 2008

Master Of The Universe

Stephen Hawking Master Of The UniverseI was tickled to read that Stephen Hawking has a new TV series kicking off on Channel 4 tonight called "Stephen Hawking: Master Of The Universe".

Call me adolescent if you must but it had me imagining Stephen Hawking riding his mobility scooter out to Castle Greyskull one day, holding aloft his magic sword and shouting “I HAVE THE POWER” via his electronic voice synthesiser...

“...and my mobility scooter became a mighty battle tank!”

Cue much gaudy and slightly homo-erotic thunder and lightning against a backdrop of flame and cheesily anthemic Euro-rock music.

Ah the return of He-Man at last! But this time as a man of science as well as brawn. Stephen Hawking genetically spliced with Sylvester Stallone.

It could be a truly classy series. I’m mentally composing a letter to Russell T Davies even as I type.

But any idea who could play Skeletor?

24 comments:

Rol Hirst said...

It would have to be Richard Dawkins.

Tristan said...

Q: What black and smokes at the top of the stairs?

A: Stephen Hawking in a house fire...

Inchy said...

Ooh, straight outa the B3TA joke book!

The Sagittarian said...

Skeletor would have to be Mrs Beckham...no special effects, no skinny-suit....

Steve said...

Ha ha - Rol, I'll go 50/50 with you on the film rights!

Tris, the old ones are definiteley the best.

Inchy, OK I'm no doubt going to show my complete ignorance and uncoolness here, but what is the B3TA joke book?

Hmm. You know Amanda, you might be onto something. I quite like the idea of subverting the Posh myth by hiring her purely to keep production costs down...!

Inchy said...

Steve, may I draw your attention to:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1905548281/b3ta-21

and:

http://www.b3ta.com/

It may well change your life.

The Sagittarian said...

Exactly! You wouldn't even have to feed her.

-eve- said...

I pity him. and after reading a bit of his biography, I think he'd envy you. :-) A brain without a body isn't much consolation; and a happy, loving family can't be bought at any price :-)

Steve said...

Thank you kindly, Inchy, I'll take a look in my lunchbreak...!

True, Amanda, and no make-up needed either!

Eve, I admire him. I watched his programme last night - an incredible mind but even more incredible is his determination to find an all inclusive theory of everything. What would be sad is if finally discovers it at the moment when he finally loses his ability to communicate...

MOTHER OF MANY said...

I know your image of the mobility scooter morphing will be one that will be with me always and each time someone comes hurtling towards me on a pavement on a scooter I shall definitely be wary of it and what it might morph into!

Daisy said...

i may just have to check that series out...let me know if it is worth downloading...

Reluctant Blogger said...

Oh what a superb comment box. I just love how the references to Victoria Beckham keep popping in just when you least expect them. I bet she doesn't often find herself mentioned alongside Stephen Hawking.

This was yet another programme which I did not watch.

Steve said...

Ally, I'm sure that Stephen Hawking has a good sense of humour and hopefully would love the idea of being able to morph into "He-Man"!

Daisy, it's defintiely worth a look-see... educational and thought provoking. Managed to keep me awake yesterday evening despite lack of sleep the night before; that's got to be a recommendation!

Gina, being put into the same room as Victoria Beckham would be the only time that Stephen Hawking would ever be considered as overweight...

The Hitch said...

Steve
When an adult finds himself composing a letter to "Dr Who" it probably time that he found a hobby or seeks some kind of medical intervention,

Steve said...

Too true Hitch... would you be suggesting your own brand of tablets by any chance...? ;-)

The Hitch said...

well steve
look at me
I got two horns for the price of one.

I am thinking of targeting the African American market

"Wanna please that nasty bitch?
then get yo viagra from tha Hitch"

Sung by Aled Jones (he needs the cash)and mixed by 51 year old white bishops son "homie" Tim Westwood.

-eve- said...

Yes, the way life is, ALS probably WILL run its course before he has time to do all the things that he wants to. Ironic, huh...

Steve said...

Ironic and very sad, Eve. It must be a very hard fact for him to live with... according to the programme he is using once facial muscle to communicate with at the moment. I guess it's one of the biggest ironies of all: someone with something very important to say robbed of the ability to communicate while the rest of the world spouts endless drivel with such ease and nonchalance!

The Hitch said...

Steve has it occured to you that the very fact that he has been deprived of the means of conventional communication makes us more inclined to listen to him?
He does after all have that unique selling point.
I wonder how many people would be so interested in this theories if he was just a normal nerdy academic.

Steve said...

Actually, that's a very good point Hitch... his disability and subsequent coping strategies are what have made him known to the general public far more than any of his theories, as amazing as they are. How many other top scientists can any of us name?

It's off the wall, slightly off topic and undoubtedly bad taste but I'd love to see Stephen Hawking on Celebrity Come Dancing...

Annie said...

Stephen Hawking is quite remarkable tho', don't you think? I'm amazed that he's reached the age of 66, with his condition.

Celebrity Come Dancing - ooh Steve, you are a one! I suppose he could always move to 'Dancing Cheek to Cheek'

Steve said...

I think he's very remarkable Annie and I do wonder if his long survival against the odds (the doctors originally gave him a couple of years to live) is due to his determination to prove the doctors wrong.

"Cheek to cheek"! Ah, you're too quick for me - I missed that one entirely!

Matthew Rudd said...

Jeremy Hardy: "Stephen Hawking is very clever, but we should never forget he is liable to interference from minicab drivers."

Steve said...

Matthew, that is very definitely the last word. Almost.