Sunday, December 30, 2007

Darlin' you give love a bad name...

Lucy Griffiths as Maid Marian** Spoiler warning!! **

Shock ending to the BBC's Robin Hood last night.

Dirty Git of Gisbourne killed Maidenly Marian! And after I'd spent hours on-line accumulating loads of pictures of the gorgeous Lucy Griffiths purely to illustrate my throbbing reviews of the show!

The dirty rotter!

Mind you, he'd been pushed to the limit poor lad. Marian, I must admit, had become something of a prick-tease over the recent weeks:

First she promised to marry Robin. Then she pretended to give Gisbourne the green light, abusing his leathery northern affections to wheedle out various advantages for Robin and his mucky men. Then she regularly snuck out from the castle to feed the poor, right the occasional wrong and spoon Robin like a good 'un. Then Gisbourne caught her, covered up her illicit activities to save her from the wrath of the Sheriff and out of the goodness of his own heart revealed that he was embroiled in a plot (with the Sheriff) to kill good King Richard. Marian naturally begged Guy to to do the decent thing - i.e. not kill good King Richard - and promised that if he thus came good she would reward him by doing the indecent thing and... er... let him come good in another way...

And then the naughty girl marries Robin Hood on the spur of the moment whilst tied to a wooden stake out in the middle of the Arabian desert. Make up your bloody mind girl!

And then she makes the mistake of rubbing it into Gisbourne's face in the last few minutes of the episode. Doh! That's just asking for trouble, that is.

The inevitable happened. The poor man snapped. You could see it in his black leather trench coat. It flapped slightly more stiffly than usual and then he shoved his dirty great sword right up and through Marian's rather saucily curved belly.

I'm sure I don't have to belabour the link between swords and the male reproductive organ...

Anyway, that's twice Gisbourne has stabbed Marian now. Feeling a mite frustrated are we, Guy?

As for Marian, she must be wondering what the hell she did wrong. I mean she does everything to get laid and instead gets laid low with a ruddy steel blade. Forever. One last snog with Robin and she pops her Laura Ashley clogs to flit up to the great Sherwood Forest in the sky.

Gone forever.

The best thing in the entire show written out.

My motivation to watch the show has lessened considerably. And to make it even worse they even married Djaq off to Will Scarlett and the pair decided to settle down to a life of domestic bliss (?) in the Holy Land.

All the eye candy for the boys wiped out in one fell swoop.

Are the writer's insane?

Ho hum. I guess Lucy Griffiths wanted to move onto bigger, more serious, more historically accurate things... and I for one don't blame her. I wish her well and would like to add that she can wear any of her incongruous, anachronistic costumes round my way any time...

I promise to be very careful where I stash my sword.

Lucy Griffiths as Maid Marian

13 comments:

Daisy said...

she may come back as a ghost...or have a twin who was lost at birth who comes back...it's television darling they can come up with anything...
have a happy new year steve...and know there will be another maiden soon...

Steve said...

Ah but she won't have a chin as strong or a wardrobe as idiosyncratic and iconoclastic as Lucy Griffiths! ;-)

A very Happy New Year to you as well Daisy!

Reluctant Blogger said...

Well, I haven't watched Robin Hood, nor have I ever seen Lucy Griffiths in anything (or out of anything come to that!).

Maybe there's a lego kit eh? Perhaps Karen will buy it for you for your next birthday? You could build you own Lucy - dress her and undress her as you see fit.

And yeah, happy New Year, Steve and thanks for all your lovely comments on my blog.

I wish you didn't always look at me so disapprovingly though over the top of your glasses!

Steve said...

Build my own Lego Lucy Griffith's doll eh? Hmm. I need to invest in some more bricks...!

Thank you for all your comments on my blog too - much appreciated and it's always good to see you drop by. I always think my photo makes me look like Adrian Mole peering over the top of his diary...!

Daisy said...

i'm trying here steve...lol...she may have better boobs? does that count? lmao

TimeWarden said...

Television has a habit of removing the best things from their series! I don't see how you can have "Robin Hood" without Maid Marian.

Not sure I believe that those hours online "accumulating loads of pictures" were purely for illustrative purposes but I'm sure you can put the collection to good use! ;) Exactly how many images are we talking of here?!!

Sorry Lucy seems to have been killed off, though, Steve. I hated it when Nicola Bryant/Peri was written out of "Doctor Who"!

Steve said...

Ha ha! Thanks Daisy - better boobs always count! ;-) Mind you not sure if RB's Lego model suggestion would lend itself to "better boobs". Much as I love Lego I'm not sure it can compete with mother nature...! ;-)

Hi TimeWarden, God knows what is going on with the writers... I mean, they completely left Friar Tuck out of the legend from day one... but as you say, Maid Marian is rather an integral role. As for the pics... well, I must admit, there's actually precious few decent pics of Lucy Griffiths available on-line. I managed to accumulate a paltry 10... it's disappointment all round!

Janete Cabral said...

Hi Steve!

I haven't seen Robin Hood at all, so I won't read the post yet. I am still waiting for season 2 of Rome to come out here, although at this rate I will be back in Lancaster before too long.

Wishing you and your family a wonderful New Year and may all your dreams come true.

Thank you for taking the time ro read and hope our friendship will continue for many years to come :)

take care

janete

Steve said...

Hi Janete - I was a very lucky boy for Christmas as Karen bought me the Rome boxed set so I can watch it all over and over again. Hope it reaches NZ soon!

Hope you're enjoying your travelling - I'm quite envious. It's always a pleasure to read your blog and I shall continue to be a regular visitor. Thank you for dropping by on mine - it's always appreciated and like you I hope our friendship will continue on many years into the future. Have a very happy 2008!

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Ive gotta say though that Guy was a much better character, and far tastier, than that 18-year old snot-nosed Gap Advert boy band reject Robin.

Steve said...

Hmm, I can see where you're coming from Mermaid but it's a pretty poor choice for the girl... Gap Band reject or Spandau Ballet video has-been... hmm. At least the ruby in Keith Allen's smile is worth some dosh...

Matthew Rudd said...

Gordon Kennedy is ace.

Steve said...

He is Matthew - but severely under-used!