Tom in now a little over 6 weeks old – it’s hard to believe! In some ways the time has flown by and in others it feels like Tom has always been with us. That last is a really nice feeling. He was weighed again on Tuesday and is now a hefty 10lb 2oz. He’s putting on the beef nicely and is turning into a lovely chubby little baby.
He’s also started smiling properly too – smiling in recognition of Karen and myself and in response to happy tones of voice. All signs that he’s developing as he should.
My only regret at the moment is that we’ve still not been able to take him to visit my granddad. Shortly before Tom was born my granddad was admitted into hospital with an infection which turned out to be C. Diff. He ended up being kept in for 4 weeks and Karen and I were advised by the doctors to stay well away to prevent any chance of the infection spreading to Tom. It can be fatal in adults let alone in new born babies.
He’s been home now for 2 weeks and frustratingly the official medical advice is still to keep Tom away – my granddad is still complaining of feeling ill and has stomach problems. It’s quite heartbreaking to keep him and Tom apart but Karen and I daren’t risk doing anything else.
I spoke to my doctor about it yesterday and she at least said it would be safe for me to visit him provided we kept physical contact at a minimum so all being well I’m going to nip out to see him during my lunchbreak today. But as for Tom she thought he’d probably be safe but it was best not to risk it. What my granddad needs to do is inform his own doctor of his ongoing problems and get himself tested.
Persuading him to do that is going to be easier said that done, however, as he’s terrified that they’ll take him back into hospital. And I really sympathise with that but I guess the crunch is if he wants to see Tom then he needs to ensure that he’s totally C. Diff free.
I just hope I can get that across to him without hurting his feelings...
12 comments:
Would it be safe if Tom and grandad both wore masks and gloves, or a little too obstructive to the bonding process?
Believe me, Laura, I have seriously considered old fashioned diving suits with metal "fish bowl" helmets... but alas they don't do them in Tom's size...
steve...good luck on your meeting today...the only advice i can give is to be very clear and honest with your grandfather...a lot of times we want to soften things and word around them...if you do this you will be doing you both an injustice...he is an adult...you are an adult...time has come (as you have Tom to consider) to make that next step...it is very difficult i will agree when i did it with my dad and taking his car from him it was one of the hardest things i ever had to do...he was having mini strokes (how they were described) and was losing conciousness while driving...i told him how it would look if he was driving and my son (his only grandchild) was riding his bike to visit his grandfather...he reluctantly gave me the keys and started taking his meds regular...good luck...
Thanks Daisy, I did just that and he was absolutely fine about it. He obviously wants the best for Thomas and just as importantly himself too. Hopefully we'll get a doctor sorted out ASAP.
i'm glad to have helped...it is so hard when trying to help those who were our caretakers throughout our life...and i wish you all the best...
I'm really sorry to hear about your Granddad, Steve, and doubly sorry that you are unable to introduce Tom and him to each other. I also understand your Granddad's lack of love for hospitals! I hate the places myself. I know their aim is for the greater good but, in the end, it always comes down to individuals. Just like bus drivers, one nurse can be genuinely friendly and caring while another is there simply to earn her daily crust. I already know which are which on my Mum's ward!
Men are much worse at sorting out their health issues than women. Men put it off indefinitely while women get it sorted. A generalisation I know, but there's usually some truth in these things. Good to hear that Tom is doing well and I hope the two generations of your family bond as soon as is feasibly possible. Thank you for asking after my Mum. It's very complicated and she has her good and bad days but I don't think she will be home in time for Christmas.
Hi TimeWarden, I quite agree. He's hopeless about getting things sorted out and has a stubborn refusal to involve doctors until the last minute or he's practically "bullied" into it by other members of the family. Mind you, I'm the same... I hate going to the doctors and always feel like a charlatan when I eventually do go.
I know what you mean about nursing staff too. I worked in a nursing home for 7 years prior to my current job and I was always aware that there was a huge difference in care provided by those fulfilling a personal vocation and those just keeping a roof over their heads... So sorry to hear your mum won't be home for Christmas. That must be a real blow. As always everyone here sends their very best wishes.
Hate hospickles myself...when I had our first babe (now 12 yrs) one of the nurses on at night was a real shite. She even told me she didn't even like babies! I went home the next day.
You're doing the right thing by everyone, bud. Such bravery in one so young. No, not being sarcastic, its true. Some young'uns will always take the easy road. Good on ya! Glad to hear your wee chap (Thom that is) is doing so well.
Thanks Amanda, it was tricky with my granddad - I didn't want him to feel like a pariah - so impressed on him how much we wanted to bring Tom up to see him. He obviously wants what's best for Tom even if he's less bothered about doing it for himself. Hopefully all will turn out well and we can get great granddad introduced to great grandson very soon!
Sorry to hear about the problems. I can understand it must be a very frustrating situation. Here's wishing your grandfather a speedy recovery so he can be properly united with Tom!
Many thanks OC, much appreciated.
Yes, you're right... Tom is developing nicely; his developmental milestones seem to be spot on...! Here's hoping granddad will recover soon... :-)
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