Friday, March 16, 2007

Bring Back The Nit Nurse

Nit Nurse pictureThis week my household has enjoyed a singularly itchy encounter with nits, care of my boy’s infant school. The poor lad’s scalp has been a moveable feast for a whole army of little head lice and their chomping offspring.

We have staunchly countered their invasion with copious administrations of hair conditioner and that old standby the nit comb. To be sure we remove every colony of the nit nation Karen and I have also submitted ourselves to regular nit grooming.

I’m proud to say that not only was I nit free but my hair is now lovely and glossy and has a sheen not unlike satin seen by moonlight.

Now, as problems go nit picking (ho ho) is a pretty small one and easily dealt with though it is a mite (pun!) inconvenient to have to submit to the nit removal regime every night.

All of this could have been avoided or the chances of it at least lessened, however, if the school employed that hardy bastion of anti-nit warfare, the Nit Nurse. We used to have regular visits from this rubber gloved lady of lice destruction when I was at school and all occurrences of nits were nicely contained and quickly dealt with as a consequence.

My boy’s school however does not utilize the Nit Nurse – maybe this is a national policy, who knows? – as they feel it draws negative attention to the condition and stigmatizes those who develop it. What rot. So instead of nit outbreaks being stamped upon quickly and efficiently they are left until the whole class gets infected. Marvelous. That’s one way of “leveling the playing field” I guess. Now no-one need feel picked on just because they’ve got nits… cos everybody’s got ‘em.

I can’t help feeling that this is a sad case of political correctness over commonsense. It’s also surely just a marketing problem. Sell the Nit Nurse to people in a positive light and you remove the stigma along with the nits. Simple.

And what stigma is there anyway? My boy has been very proud of his head-based nit farm and has eagerly been telling everybody about it.

Well, those who have stood still long enough...

10 comments:

-eve- said...

This was amusing...:-) And it's the first I've heard of a Nit Nurse...!

MOTHER OF MANY said...

Being a nurse that started training in 1980, I went out with the nit nurses as part of my training, I can honestly say that I believe that the loss of nit nurses was purely to do with money.
Having 6 girls, none of whom have ever had short hair, I can honestly say,'nits are a nightmare and bloody expensive to deal with'.With the summer coming the little suckers will be multilping everywhere(the nits that is)!

Steve said...

Hi Eve, I'm glad I have broadened your horizons enough that the wonderful world of nit-dom is now familiar to you!

Aly, you're probably right... another case of the Government off-setting expenditure for health services onto the tax paying public. Curse them! I wish them a plague of something very itchy...

Flaming Nora said...

Oh how I pity you and your missus. Just reading that post made my head itch.

TimeWarden said...

I'm starting work on a new "Doctor Who" story, right this minute. Inspired by your latest post, Steve, it's gonna be called "Invasion of the Nits"!

Steve said...

Sounds like the type of story that will get right under anyone's skin... please bring back Billie Piper in a nurse's uniform!

Andrew Glazebrook said...

Bring back the Nit Nurse and all those great things we had when I was a kid,and as for Billie Piper in a Nurse's uniform just show me where I have to sign the petition !!!

Steve said...

Too right. Something tells me her stethoscope will always be nice and warm...

Aziza said...

Good for people to know.

Steve said...

You seem to be packing a helluva lot of insurance on your blog, Aziza...!